HelloFridays

It takes forever for these homemade graphics of mine to load. I would like to say it is well worth the wait, but after you've waited the 45 seconds or so you would probably be so upset that you would not get anything out of the inspirational section below. So I suggest that you go ahead and start reading the text and then come back to the top when your done. Then you can admire my limited graphics ability. Sincerely, HF graphics department.

From Beautiful Belleair Bluffs, Florida:
Hello Fridays attempts to get you to do two things: to think and to laugh, both of which are critical to your health and success in an ever-challenging world. Take a moment and ponder with your heart, and then turn around, kick back, and laugh until it hurts. You deserve the inspiration and the break! GOD BLESS.
NUMBER 29

ONE DAY AT A TIME

On Friday, July 17, late in the afternoon in a very small village on the north coast of Papua New Guinea life changed dramatically forever for several thousand people. An off shore earthquake created a tidal wave 23 feet high which in seconds wiped out the entire village, huts, boats, and all of the people. Gone! This little community was unique. It was a peninsula only 75 yards wide and a mile or so long, laying between the ocean and a huge lagoon. A very small strip of existence for around 1,800 people. Now all that remains are a few surviving palm trees. A majority of the people are dead. Just another tragedy in our ever-increasing recent history of natural disasters??? Not for me. You see I spent 8 days on that peninsula in that village several years ago. My good friends John and Bonnie Nystrom have spent the last nine years of their life living and working with the Arop people of the village.

The only reason I even mention this horrifying story is to point out the temporal nature of the existence you and I keep. Jesus told a story that is recorded in Luke chapter 12. It is about a man that had things going pretty good. As a matter of fact things were so good that he devised a plan that would enable him to kick back, turn the controls over to someone else, and retire to a life of pleasure and happiness. But he had one small problem: the very night he launched his grand plan he died. Boom - gone.

We have a tendency to take control of our future. Career plans, IRAs, country homes, and a big dose of presumption. We just assume that we will live to be very old, very secure, very comfortable, and very happy. So we plan accordingly. In kind of a naive, self-confident way we forget to factor God into our plans. Oh we pray, and we ask God for direction, but basically we plan our plans and we tend to be right in the middle of them benefiting all of the way.

James states in his letter, chapter 4 verses 13-15 "Come now you who say, 'Today or tomorrow, we shall go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit.' Yet you don't know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we shall live and also do this or that.' But as it is, you boast in your arrogance; all such boasting is evil".

We really have no guarantee of tomorrow beyond knowing as believers that our eternity is secure in Christ.

Sure we need to be wise with our money, and we need to plan so that we can provide for those God has entrusted to us. But to be honest we ought to live one day at a time, totally enveloped in God's grace and care. If we could just live each day according to his Word, yearning to honor Him with our thoughts, words, and actions and touching those around us with His love - He would be well pleased. Then if today is our last day - so be it.

I want to be like the Puritan who prayed,

"If my life should end today, let this be my best day!"

Now it's time to get SILLY

BC
(Sent in by Laurie Hale - Texas)

My friend is a rather old-fashioned lady, always quite delicate and elegant, especially in her language. She and her husband were planning a week's vacation in Florida, so she wrote to a particular campground and asked for a reservation.

She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped, but didn't quite know how to ask about the toilet facilities. She just couldn't bring herself to write the word "toilet" in her letter. After much deliberation she finally came up with the old-fashioned term "bathroom commode." But when she wrote that down, she still felt that she was being too forward. So she started all over again, rewrote the entire letter, and referred to the bathroom commode merely as the B.C. "Does the campground have its own B.C.?" is what she finally wrote.

Well, the campground owner wasn't old-fashioned at all, and when he got the letter he just couldn't figure out what the woman was talking about. That B.C. business really stumped him. After worrying about it for a while, he showed the letter to several campers, but no one could imagine what the lady meant, either. So the campground owner, finally coming to the conclusion that the lady must be asking about the location of the Baptist Church, sat down and wrote the following reply:

One of the problems in today's world is that we just don't have time to ponder, to think creatively, to meditate, or to develop a thought. I remember many years ago when I was a letter carrier. The job was hard work, particularly the summer, but it afforded me several hours each day to just think, to be creative. It is incredible what the mind can do when given a chance. Then you add in the spiritual dimension (meditating on God's Word day and night) and you really do start to get a renewed mind (Romans 12:2).

My family is off visiting relatives, and so I have found some time to think. I heard again today about another terrible crime where some kids are going to go to jail. I was kicking around in my mind why so many convicts come to know Christ in prison. It would be easy to say they are just trying to get a break on their sentence by being religious, but I believe there is more to it than that. Consider the following possibilities.

1) When you have done something so bad that it puts you behind bars, perhaps for the rest of your life, I believe you really contemplate forgiveness and its implications. Well, who is the greatest forgiver of all? These men and women in jail desperately need forgiveness and so they seek out God - the Master forgiver. Unfortunately for us on the outside, we tend to discount God's forgiveness, because we are not desperate enough for it. After all, things are good, we are free, comfortable, relatively happy, relatively protected, autonomous, affluent, free to choose our destiny. Yet the truth is we need forgiveness just as desperately as the most heinous mass murderer. Our autonomy is based on God's grace, we deserve the most severe punishment, but instead we get the grace of God. Don't wait until you are incarcerated by guilt, shame, pain, or self-condemnation to receive God's grace - it is sufficient.

2) I believe that convicts become more open to God because they have lost most of their self-sufficiency. They no longer can choose how they spend their time or their resources. They don't have the freedom to do as they please. So since they are limited in these areas by the penal system they are more willing to look for true freedom in God. The things we have and do, these so-called freedoms, can very easily become large chains around our neck - keeping us from living for God. The prisoner has the trappings of the world stripped away. We are encumbered by them. Why do we choose to be imprisoned by our stuff? I don't know for Dear Madam: I regret very much the delay in answering your letter, but I now take the pleasure of informing you that a B.C. is located nine miles north of the campground, and is capable of seating 250 people at one time. I admit it is quite a distance away if you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to learn that a great number of our people take their lunches along and make a day of it. They usually arrive early and stay late. If you don't start early, you probably will not make it in time. The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded we had to stand up the whole time we were there. It may interest you to know that right now, there is a supper planned to raise money to buy more seats. They're going to hold it in the basement of the B.C. I would like to say it pains me very much not being able to go more often, but it surely is no lack of desire on my part. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in cold weather. If you decide to come down to our campground, perhaps I could go with you the first time you go, sit with you, and introduce you to all the other folks. Remember, this is a friendly community!!

THINGS THAT IRRITATE A SANE PERSON
(sent in by Daryl Renshaw - Florida)

The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.

There's always a car riding your tail when you're slowing down to find an address.

You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.

It's bad enough that you step in dog poop, but you don't realize it till you walk across your living room rug.

The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper never works for you.

There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING!

You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.

Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.

You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette.

You slice your tongue licking an envelope.

Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you're trying to get a reading.

A station comes in brilliantly when you're standing near the radio, but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.

There are always one or two ice cubes that won't pop out of the tray.

You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.

The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian finish crossing.

A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling.

You set the alarm on your digital clock for 7pm instead of 7am.

The radio station doesn't tell you who sang that song.

You rub on hand cream and can't turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.

People behind you on a supermarket line dash ahead of you to a counter just opening up.

You can't look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don't know how to spell it.

You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you're just browsing.

You had that pen in your hand only a second ago and now you can't find it.

You reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up.

ONLY IN AMERICA
(Sent in by Chiqui Polo - Texas)
(and also Mike Sauerwein - Florida)

Only in America...
...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance...

...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink...

...do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke...

...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters...

...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage...

...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place...

...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight...

...do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures"

FUN STUFF
(Sent in by Chrys Hambley - Florida)

Ministry Humor
Three Pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said "Ya know, since summer started I've been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I've tried everything--noise, spray, cats--nothing seems to scare them away. Another said "Yea, me too. I've got hundreds living in my belfry and in the narthex attic. I've even had the place fumigated, and they won't go away." The third said, "I baptized all mine, and made them members of the church... Haven't seen one back since" !!!

A minister was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners who he knew as being an unkempt housekeeper. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life. "Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, "They're as clean as soap and water could get them." He felt a bit apprehensive but blessed the food anyway and started eating. It was really delicious and he said so, despite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and called, "Here Soap! Here Water!"

Help for the Sick
A little nine year old girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill. "Mommy" she said "Can we leave now?" "No" her mother replied. "Well, I think I have to throw up!" "Then go out the front door and around to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush." In about two minutes the little girl returned to her seat. "Did you throw up?" her mother asked. "Yes" the little girl replied. "Well, how could you have gone all the way to the back of the church and return so quickly?" "I didn't have to go out of the church, Mommy" the little girl replied, "They have a box next to the front door that says 'for the sick'."

From the "Show Me" State:
In the back woods of Missouri, a guy's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing." Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. "Whoa there pal!" said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down...I think there's yet another one to come." Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a girl. "No, no, don't be in a great hurry to put down that lantern. It seems there's another one coming!" cried the doctor. The guy scratched his head in bewilderment, and asks the doctor. "Do ya think it's the light that's attractin' them?"

WEDDING HUMOR
(Sent in by Orlando Reyes - Florida)

Two TV antennas met on a rooftop, fell in love and decided to get married. The ceremony was awful, but the reception was excellent.

SPECIAL PRAYER REQUESTS

This is a new section I 'm adding to highlight a few very special needs that I hear about. I have included their email addresses in case you would like to drop them a note of encouragement to let them know you are praying for them.

Please pray for:

1) David Mills. The 4 month old, only child of Jim and Sandy Mills. David was born with serious heart problems, and this week he developed a blood infection that has put his precious little life in peril. (JnSMills@aol.com)

2) John and Bonnie Nystrom. They are the missionaries to the village of Arop that was wiped away by the tidal wave in Papua New Guinea. They need lots of prayer as they set out to minister to the survivors and rebuild their ministry in the village. (Bonnie_Nystrom@sil.org)

3) Max Gessner. Max is running for the School Board here in Pinellas county. Our School Board here needs Christian men of high moral integrity and wisdom to stave off the onslaught of liberalism in our schools. Pray for Max to overcome the odds and win this election. (MartiGess@aol.com)

See YA!!!!!

For those of you praying for my new assignment as Executive Director of HEDGEBUILDERS (www.hedge.org) let me share with you that things are going very well. We now have HB representatives in Massachusetts, Nebraska, Nevada, Australia, and Florida of course. If you would like to join the HB family just e-mail me and I will get you all of the information.

The Mustache Guy

It is a wonderful opportunity to make a few extra dollars or change careers, and all for the protection of our homes and the glory of God! One Senior adult here in Florida signed up for HEDGEBUILDERS after hearing about it over the radio. He e-mailed me to say how grateful he was that he could now allow his grandkids to play on his computer without having to worry - He finished his comments by saying "What a Ministry!" He's right!

God bless and have a great week! Ken

P.S. I have built in an Archives section below if you would like to read any of the previous issues.

This EDITION of HF has been sponsored by HEDGEBUILDERS.

Click on the banner above for more information about Hedgebuilders.

(Special note to new "Hello Fridays" recipients. "Hello Fridays" is a free, bi-monthly, e-mail publication (and now Web page) that I send out which includes inspiration and wit. It all started in February of 1997. You are receiving it because you either requested it, someone else put you on the recipient's list, it was forwarded to you, or through sheer dumb luck. If, for some unexplainable reason, you would like to discontinue receiving HF, you can e-mail me at Hello-Fridays@juno.com to let me know to remove you from future mailings. Also if you come across any neat stuff, either serious or funny, that you think would make a great addition to HF, please send it my way.)

I would love to hear from you at Hello-Fridays@juno.com